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What I'm exploring with

Posted on 11/28/2013

 

 
I'm often asked that question, or something like it. Why are you making this film? Well, it's a question all filmmakers should ask themselves long and hard before they jump into a film. What does this film truly mean to me? Is it something that needs to be made - i.e. am I adding something fresh and meaningful to the cinematic landscape or is it just more movie detritus clogging up the distribution pipeline?
 
Good questions. But I think most people are really asking me what personal issues I have that would make this film relevant to me. They don't ask me straight up like that, of course, but that is the subtext of their question when they ask "Why are you making this film?" Am I a swinger? Am I interested in the lifestyle? Do I have intimacy issues? Sexual issues? Am I just a horn dog or kinky bastard?
 
They often think I'm making porn. But obviously, I'm trying to explore something more than just sex in this dynamic. Hence, the title "Connection". But I do feel there is a lot to explore in the sex itself. Sex is a very powerful and complex cinematic metaphor, because it is such a hot button topic for psychological, social and spiritual reasons. Even porno, as superficial and direct as it is, speaks volumes about who we are individually and culturally. The reasons it (or any individual pornographic act within a porn film) stimulates us, reviles us, or leaves us indifferent says a lot about our beliefs, choices, preferences, fears, fetishes, issues and more.
 
I want to make a film that holds a mirror up to ourselves in a similar way, albeit in a more complicated, nuanced, artistic and multi-dimensional way than a typical porn film. What really interests me are relationships - and what role sex plays in its connective tissue. I was in a monogamous relationship for nearly 17 years - 15 of those years married. There was so much of that relationship that was NOT about sex. Yet, our sexual dynamic was always around us, defined us and, ultimately, destroyed us. And when that relationship ended, so did I lot of my rather traditional thinking about relationships. However, I have yet to discover some new, ideal paradigm. I guess it's different for everybody. But I certainly haven't found it for myself, yet.
 
So, I'm exploring, questioning, considering....experiencing. Letting things wash over me and listening to my reaction to them. This is what I want my film to do for people. It will be an experience. A brief journey into a very specific world. If it is a world with which you are familiar, you can look at it - and feel it - from a distanced, artistic perspective and either celebrate or re-examine your place in it. If it is a world completely alien to you, you can take a frank, intimate, physically-safe, psychologically-challenging tour through it and check yourself afterwards. Either way, the point is not to answer questions, but to raise them. To have you explore, question, consider and experience......